The compliment

“I was always bad at receiving compliments.  If someone pointed out a positive quality about me, the voice between my ears would start talking–and sometimes so would I.  ‘Well…but…’ and it would go on, pointing out the reason or reasons the highlighted quality was not actually true.  These were awkward moments.  I just never knew how to let someone give me praise and I did not know why.  

One day, an acquaintance of mine said to me, ‘You’ve got beautiful skin!’.  My inner voice kicked in to remind me that my skin was actually horrible.  I proceeded to tell her just as much.  She smiled and warmly cut into my self-deprecating statements with - ‘just say thank you’.  A bit embarrassed, I thanked her.  And that quieted me down.  

Frankly, at this point in my life, I had an idea why receiving compliments was a struggle for me and it was something I was working on.  I didn’t have a great view of myself and couldn’t see how others would.  I began treating myself more like someone I loved.  I asked myself what I needed.  I listened to myself when I was down.  I treated myself when I needed to be treated.  This may all sound silly, but it worked!  

This has been a journey that I continue to work on today.  That is why 10 years later the above conversation still sits in the forefront of my memory.  I don’t see myself so much that way anymore, thankfully.  Today, when someone gives me a compliment I try to be very mindful to say ‘thank you’ and to embrace it and imagine that it just may be true.

-Anonymous

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